Let’s Learn to be Happy!
| Suman Arora - 25 Jan 2019

Let’s Learn to be Happy!


By Suman Arora

The fact that happiness is a state of mind became crystal clear to me on the day I got a wisdom tooth extracted. As my wisdom tooth was hurting me, given its unusual spacing in my jaw line, it needed to be removed. Anyway, normally, I relish very hot tea. I don’t like it if it gets even a little cold, I seem to have taken it from my mother. She would even have the fan switched off while having tea so that it did not turn cold.

Anyway, the dentist advised me against having hot tea or coffee. I was amazed at myself for relishing even just next-to-cold, lukewarm tea which I always rejected under normal circumstances!

Moral of the story: The parameters of happiness change with the change in the situation.

I read somewhere, “A guy met one of his school-mates several years after school and he could not believe his eyes - his friend was driving one of the latest sleek Mercedes Benz cars. He went home, feeling awful and very disappointed in himself. He thought he was a failure. But, what he didn’t know was that his friend was a driver and had been sent to run errands in his boss’s car!”

Here, he felt very bad that his friend had achieved more success than him but had he known the truth, he would have felt happy at having achieved more success than his friend! Well, where does his happiness lie? In achieving what he did or in making a comparative study with others and then determining the level of his happiness!

There is an interesting scene in the Hindi movie, ‘3 Idiots’ where the two friends are very sad at having presumed that their third friend has failed in his exams. But, after some time when they come to know that he has actually topped, they become sadder because the fundamentals of human psychology establish that we cannot digest someone else, even if a close friend, scoring way higher than us.

What is happiness? Actually, happiness should not be dependent on external factors. In reality, it is just a state of mind. We have to find happiness deep within us. There are different parameters of happiness for all of us. People keep chasing material gains 'to be happy’ but if happiness lay in material benefits, then, rich people would have been the happiest around.

Let’s find out what makes us happy? When we watch a good movie, we’re happy. When we listen to a favourite song, we’re happy. When we read a good book, we’re happy.  When we spend time with family and friends, we’re happy. When our children grow up to be good human beings, we’re happy.The happiest feeling comes out of doing a good deed. Lend a helping hand, spread a cheer, reach out to those who need you. An act of helping others is sure to make you feel good.

Let’s learn to be happy with what we have and not lust after what we do not. Let’s learn to be thankful for our blessings. Learning to do a little soul-searching will help us grow inward and that will lead to a peaceful mind and a happy heart.

We must learn to understand that each of us is born with a different purpose of life. We all have a different journey to undertake. No amount of plotting or scheming by anyone is going to upset the other’s glories of life.

We should only focus on what we are meant to do. Let’s not forget what is destined to be ours will come to us and no amount of running after can bring to us what is not meant for us.

Learning to be happy and contented is a choice. Let’s train our minds to look for the silver lining even in the darkest of moments. Let's learn to seek positivity even in negative situations. Let’s learn to be happy!


(The Writer is the Author of two books on human behaviour, Soul’tweets’ and One Step Higher…)

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